I can't believe it's the 20th. I'm annoyed by this because I was expecting a lot of projects to have started by now and all I'm getting are hold ups. The Children's book illustration gig I've been picking at since May is the only thing solid. Everything else this month has been impulse storyboard and banner projects that only take a few hours. As for furry art, I'm still finishing Anthrocon commissions in-between saving giant Photoshop documents.

I have been to a surprising number of animation networking and promotion events the past couple of months. They spring up more often when there's a shortage of industry jobs in NYC. Through them, past interviews, and client meetings I've heard a lot of low grumbling about studios in India. The underlining complaint being, you get what you pay for. Lots of recent outsourcing for cheep labor has left American studios picking up the pieces, in publishing, animation, and even flash web design. Indian studios are also saturating all the linkedin.com groups with their bad grammar adds! It's really getting obnoxious!

This Saturday is my TKD red belt test! Then I have to start training for black belt tests. I have to do 1,000 jumps with a jump rope and 50 v sit-ups. I'm sure there are more I don't know about yet ~_~

I haven't lost any weight this year. My endurance and balance are much better but not my weight. I'm sure I'll be able to jump better if I'm 20 pounds lighter. This is what I think while I'm curling 20 pound weights. I'm so tempted to try diet pills. Maybe I should try jumping with a 20 pound weight.

This past week in TKD we've started doing tension strength training with these rubber noodle looking ropes. It's feels so awesome after an hour. I've got to get one to use at home.

I'll be back in Phoenix for Christmas and New Years. It will be great to see my family. And I just found out that there are dragons in the Phoenix Zoo now :D I've also reconnected with a tone of people I know from middle and high school a la facebook. Maybe I can meet up with some of them. Throw a mini reunion :O Apologize for being such a douchy brat!

WHAT THE FUCK SUPERNATURAL I DON'T EVEN

THIS IS GOING TO BE A CAPSLOCK POST

( SPOILERS AHOY )

Cue giant spamcut! So these are a few snaps of what transpired saturday night. I didn't take pics of everyone cause... uh... they're mostly rachel's friends and it feels kinda weird posting too many photos of people I don't know up my lj lol. (I HAV FRIENDS NO REALLY D:) But there were loads of awesome costumes, I'm spewing I didn't get a pic of the guy who came as Zeus though. XD

( SO MANY PICTURES. If your comp is slow or anything, THIS WILL KILL IT. lolllllllllll )

I hope you listened up this was SRS BZNZ

I seems characters from Supernatural are now being used as fillers and extras in my dreams.

Weird dream that started out pretty normal. I was going into my 11:30AM writing class after Thanksgiving break and I remember this because that's when our food presentations are due and I, apparently, made hashbrown casserole. I took it in one of my cute retro pyrex dishes, too. Anyhow, something happens and I leave the classroom for some reason and I end up in what seems like a long bathroom (like a school bathroom with the stalls and such). At some point, the term 'mental ward' comes into my head for it because there's other people there (mostly girls) who, while aren't necessarily mental or off in the head, but might seem that way to some people (much like how girls were committed decades ago because of normal rebellion and normal teenager things).

For some reason, I seem to be the only one who can just get up and leave at random. There aren't any guards and I tell the other girls that I'll find a way to get them out. I leave twice. Once I don't get far and I return for something (I guess I had my bag with me? I'm not sure?). The second time I leave I don't return.

I have one of my Target bags with me (those reusable ones) and I'm playing casual walking past a police officer. I make it to the main part of the school (which doesn't look like KSU anymore at this point) and another officer sees me and he has this look in his eyes like he knows I'm sneaking around for some reason. The next thing I do? I look over and spot Sam and Dean at a nearby table (though, it's not Sam and Dean Sam and Dean because I think they were just extras in my dream, but I don't know). I exploit Sam's obvious confusion by pretending he's my boyfriend (and whispering that something really fucking weird is going on in this place) and he plays along while the officer questions me. Dean had, at some point, disappeared.

Then the dream cuts to the parking lot and I'm looking for TJ's car (I'm assuming TJ is also in one of these 'mental wards', as well). There's A LOT of silver cars and I have a hard time finding it until I run across a group of people we apparently know (from Supernatural, the Ghostfacers crew) and they one kid points me in the direction of the car.

There's a cat inside. A little black kitten. I'm assuming it's ours and I clean out the car briefly while trying to keep it out of my way.

Cut back to the apartment. I'm looking for something and, at one point, I clean the bedroom. I'm thinking we need room for people? I'm not sure. I briefly lose my phone, there's no lights on in the house. This doesn't seem to be a concern for me while I'm inside, at least. I find my phone, call someone, I don't remember who. Someone I know, at least. Then I head downstairs. Upon getting ready to lock the door, I realize I don't have my keys (probably left them upstairs), but I'm in a hurry, so I grab TJ's (not dawning on my until now, how did the car get to the school if TJ's keys are still at the house).

Then I realize the lights in the garage are off (they're never off). I peek out the second door and see that the back door is open and the garage door is open. I know something's up. I lock the house door and I head towards the car. I stop at the driver's door and I see a shadowy figure in the backseat. I tell the stranger to get out and get the hell out of here (around this time, I notice it's raining, it's been raining for a day or two here in real life). The person steps out and gives me some spiel about how I have to get in the car and something something. I don't quite recall. The man is tall, but it's hard to make out features. However, I'm pretty sure it was Lucifer from Supernatural (Mark Pellegrino, not Sam Lucifer).

So I get in the car and I pull out of the driveway. As I pull out of the garage, I see a golden retriever barking from inside either my house or the house next door. I want to say it was my house, but the door it was barking from isn't a screen door and, uh, we don't have a dog. I notice that it is still raining a bit (sprinkling is more like it) and it's very bright out for being (what I'm assuming) so late at night. There are police cars all over my street, but I don't hear any sirens or much noise at all aside from the rain. The man in the back seat doesn't seem concerned by the police cars, but I keep thinking that, if I can 'accidentally' get someone's attention, maybe I can get this guy the hell out of here. I drive down the road erratically (really, how I assume I'd drive without practice anyhow. But this time it's intentional.), trying to hit one of the police cruisers. I never manage to hit one, but I notice many house on my street are on fire. The backs of them, at least. This must be the reason for all the light. It seems to be this way everywhere I drive (which isn't terribly far before I wake up). I continue to try to get SOMEONE'S attention, but I'm always just a bit short of running into a car or making a bit scene, despite the fact that I'm driving in a way that WOULD and SHOULD be noticed by someone.

Then, I wake up. I never make it back to the school.

---

When I first woke up, I thought my subconcious was telling me that 'hey, things could be worse, here!'. But after writing it down, I wonder if I wasn't dreaming that I was a ghost or something. I really don't know. Usually I can figure heads or tails of my dreams, but this one has really thrown me for a loop.

Or maybe it doesn't mean anything and I've been watching too much Supernatural.

( Dream meaning things... )

dude, you guys, I know I'm retarded.

THE BLACK IS SO CUTE. Look how cute the red roses stand out on it and how well the bunnies stand out! This makes me pretty sure that I don't want the pink or the blue (not as much contrast)


soooo... should I just suck it up and get the black? IT'S SO CUTE. Or should I get the brown which is similar in feel, but makes me feel like I'm getting something different? (trouble is apparently NO ONE saved pictures of the brown...... also, black is easier to coordinate than brown... but I could always do pink and red accessories. I did this up in PS to give you a rough idea of how the brown would look ) ... basically the issue is that I already have a couple other black print dresses.
My other black dresses are Longest name JSK, Milkychan, Merry Sweet Castle, and Sweet Check. (I don't count my all black solid jsks)

help me with my psychosis.
(thanks, btw, regarding my coat choice. I'm going to go with black if I go with anything at all.)

I think I have decided to NOT shoot for the preferred (early) deadline this year. I just don't feel ready yet. Granted- I do have about a 4-inch tall pile of drawings that I have done in the past year, but I just keep thinking that in the next month I could turn out something better. I can't submit my portfolio knowing that I had a chance to do one more piece or something. I realize that this means that my life is in limbo for another month, but that also means that I have one LESS month to wait for the letter back.

The best solution for my art space needs has presented itself to me during a conversation with a friend who's art space I wanted to rent. Since I am at work all day anyway and can't do anything in my own house, he suggested I just do my artwork here. Last year, I refined my St. Paul's drawing here over a very long Saturday. I would have access to huge tables, spraying areas, light tables, and printers. So starting next week (I am HOPING!), I will be staying at work late to work on finishing pieces and finalizing my portfolio.

I have a growing list of things I need to complete. SO MUCH of this I want opinions on from my friends. I wish half of you still lived in the friggin' state. I could really use someone else's opinion than my own. I just look at some of my stuff and think, "Is this any good or am I the only one who thinks so?" Then I have other people tell me that a piece is really good and I just stare at it- thinking, "Really? Because I am not seeing it..." I just so want to collect up all my friends, drag them somewhere and make them look at all my work and tell me if I suck or not. Because I really can't tell anymore.

How am I expected to pick 20 pieces out of a 4-inch thick pile?!

Alien Dice , Abby's Agency and Akaelae HAVE updated!
Broadcasting live now! See me at http://www.ustream.tv/channel/shivae-studios -

If you enjoy the comics, consider donating to support them/ get the ad free viewing account.
I also have a huge mountain of email to go through! Still.
Happy Thanksgiving to the college students who don't have access next week!

Visit the store for merchandise! Currently up are prints, tote bags and notebooks!

Planet 51 - Movie to see with Kim next week, I hope. Movie I'd like to see with husband: The Men Who Stare at Goats. I'm .. not all that enthusiastic about The Princess and the Frog. On one hand, I was thrilled to see a 2D movie, but the trailers keep turning me off and on ... but I want to support the 2D movie. I am intrigued by Avatar, although it has some serious (in my eyes) flaws - I think it deserves to be seen in 3D until I hear otherwise. ;) For visuals alone. I think our Christmas movie will be Sherlock Holmes and likely Alvin and the Chipmunks for Kim. Really light Christmas season it seems for movies.

Of course.. then you look at January. :D I'm a bit confused why Hoodwinked Too! was not put out in December along with Tooth Fairy - which does look funny despite how silly it is.

Some teas I got some samples of (they should be coming soon from Harney and Sons):
Fanciest Formosa Oolong
White Christmas Tea
Earl Grey Supreme
Vanilla Black
Chinese Flower
Tokyo
... and then I got a tin of Paris cause I liked it so much. :)
(Jocey, you're going to have to come over again sometime and sample teas!)

also, this Japanese froufrou interior store makes my head explode. If this was a store down the street, I'd be in serious trouble.

Just remembering what I was doing last Christmas/New Years... seems like it would be hard to beat, but I'm really looking forward to spending the holidays home this year. My family is flying out for the first time in a long time... and I'll have a house to decorate. This means a huge deal to me. I'm getting all verklempt just thinking about it. It was actually cold enough today to wear a sweatshirt AND a hat, people.

Well, folks, we are down to one moderator. To really keep this community running smoothly, we should have at least 3. So, I am opening up for applications.

I feel Artists_Beware provides a great service to our artistic community. If you feel the same way and would like to contribute some of your time to help moderate, please comment here.

I will also be doing a little updating the community info this coming weekend. It's been a long time since the last revisions, and that was just an addition to the rules about screening posts. If anyone has suggestions, you can comment here, as well. Rest assured, there will be no major changes to the purpose of the community.

I had a dream the other night that I was in the kitchen of this old, old ramshackle trailer (I vividly recall old wood paneling almost everywhere. granted, this could be almost anywhere I've lived at any point in my life, but it wasn't.). I don't know WHY I was there or even how I got there. But then there's fuckin' Jared Padaleck, Jensen Ackles and Misha Collins and I'm tyring to get them to help me get OUT. Only, it's not Sam, Dean and Castiel so we're all sort of fucked and then I woke up.

It was pretty bizzare. The longer I was stuck there, the more freaked out I was starting to get.

---

[02:58] Ally: i found the most absurd (yet well drawn) picture of dean as snake. i'm posting it to angie's facebook
[02:58] itsananimalthing: WUT
[02:58] Ally: http://firebolide.deviantart.com/art/Dean-Snake-87471150
[02:59] itsananimalthing: ...
[02:59] itsananimalthing: Oh.
[02:59] itsananimalthing: I thought you meant a snake
[02:59] itsananimalthing: snaak
[02:59] Ally: dfklghdlfkbjhdklfhgdklfghdklfhg
[02:59] itsananimalthing: I'm let down. ;_;
[02:59] Ally: obv you should draw that

---

Okay, yesterday's post was pretty epicly whiny. I discovered the reason for that and it's pretty much PMS (TMI: I thought I had another week or two before my period, so it was a bit of a surprise for me.). I sort of got all overdramatic about things that, really, I can cope with. Yeah, I was dumb with my money, but it's not the end of the world and it's certainly nothing I haven't dealt with before. But yesterday it turned into BAWWWW and ugh.

So, whatever. Not the end of the world, I'll survive and everything'll be fine.

---

Also, I think this is the first time I've use a photo of myself for an icon. How about that.

*lion runs through the other way, screaming 'stillnotreadystillnotreadystillnotreadyaaaaaauugghhh!!!'*

Okay. I will be staying at the Hampton Inn and Suites Lincolnshire (the first backup hotel), and will be at the con from Thursday afternoon to Monday morning. I'm a morning person, so if you're at that hotel, expect to see me at the complimentary breakfast. I can most often be found in the Artists Alley or the Game room, with Toon Football and Uncle Kage's story hour absolutely not to be missed, nor is Lupus in Tabula. When in costume, I will be wearing my new lion, which will most likely be in the Beast outfit that I wore for Halloween. There's a -slim- possibility I'll be in my old Oriental robe from time to time, but don't bet on it.

Out of costume, I look like this:


*lion steps up behind samoyed at the keyboard and smacks him upside the head with a rolled up newspaper. 'Get off the blasted computer and HELP ME PACK!!'*

Ow... stop hitting yourself, Hallan.

To those who are coming, I hope to see you there!

Hallan/Drift

Purpose.

Alien Dice , Abby's Agency and Akaelae HAVE updated!

If you enjoy the comics, consider donating to support them/ get the ad free viewing account. Right now I'm in the lovely position of trying to decide whether to work on comics or do a bunch of auctions or work on books. Next week is Thanksiving week and my husband and daughter will both be home every day and I'd like to be able to spend time with them and not work. At the moment, that's not going to be possible.

I also have a huge mountain of email to go through!

Visit the store for merchandise! Currently up are prints, tote bags and notebooks!

Planet 51 - Movie to see with Kim. Movie I'd like to see with husband: The Men Who Stare at Goats. Wouldn't mind seeing Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant. The Box looks like a good wait until DVD movie. I am intrigued by Avatar.

*shakes fist at Linux*

Why does this happen?

Okay...here's the deal...on Kup (my NAS and trial web server... http://hbar98.gotdns.com:8080 ) I have to telnet in and change the read/write permissions for the web directory in order for things to be all safe-like. So I go in...

Kup login: ***
Password:
su
Password:

...

haha...you know what? Nevermind. It seems to work now. No clue why.

Commands I use...
chmod -rw 'www' -R
That's supposed to remove all read/write permissions from the www directory as well as all sub directories, right?? So...
chmod +rw 'www' -R
Should add read/write permissions to the www directory as well as subs...but for some strange reason Windows explorer said...for a while...that I didn't have permission to view/edit those directories. Now it does. *sobs*

For reference...after +rw command
ls -ld www
drwxrwxrwx 4 root root

...and after -rw command
ls -ld www
d--x-wx-wx 4 root root

Should I tighten that up? How can I?? It seems as if the user only has execute, but other uses have write ability??

Dear Mako-

How ya doin'? Fine? Yeah, me too. Just wanted to say how thankful I was for your help the other night. I know I was a bit excitable, but I've been able to sleep since then and cooler heads have prevailed.

I haven't been able to find anyone locally with an air compressor that doesn't also spit out oil/water/condensation, so I haven't done that yet. However, I did go to Wal-Mart and buy a cheap can of compressed air.

My CPU temps, with being on all night, are in the low 40s. Graphics temp has simmered to a (relatively) glacial temperature of mid 50s.

So, yeah...I'm sorry for getting all worked up over something I should have checked in the first place. However, I still have that strange hard drive armature pause/click sound ever so often.

Thanks for all of your help, and I'll try to keep a better check on my excitement.

Take Care!

'hbar98'

Thanks to an unexpected (though thankfully small) emergency, I am 24 hours behind on packing and getting ready for Midwest FurFest. This means-

*lion runs through, screaming*

Yeah. That.

For those of you who have read my stories (yes, I know it's been over a year since I posted one :( ), are there any illustrations you'd like to see commissioned?

WELL. THAT WAS SOME FUN. :D Rachel's 21st was a riot... possibly my only regret was forgetting to throw Apache onto the playlist in our mad rush to get to the venue on time. Min was down for the weekend and she came as the maddest hatter. XD Also at the beginning of the night Robin hood and one of his merry men standing at a snazzy melbourne bar waiting for drinks = win.

Sunday was spent bumming, drawing, watching Ponyo, Gotham Knight, Mononoke, and making sausage rolls. :D And then Monday Min missed her train >_> So we went to the zoo! :D Then hung around the city a bit and had crepes and more inspiration. lol woohoo

Mental note: upload photos.

Ended the day by going to see 2012, which was not bad, to be honest. I feel deep down, it's okay to show off some epic insane apocalyptic VFX every once in a while. And some completely unrealistic but hilariously thrilling escape scenes. 8DDD Being a hollywood movie, there were some expected lame bits and loopholes and poor decisions, but also there were other good, even brilliant bits that more than made up for the dumb and gripes and whatnot. (SASHAAA. XD) ALSO, moral dilemma aspect FTW. THANKYOU. And the presence of characters with blurred morals. Even the main "good" characters had obvious flaws, and no one was completely guilt-free. Except maybe the monk dude in the bell tower on the mountain. lol

SO YEAH. Quite epic. Better than the last four digit John Cusack movie I'd seen anyway... ::cough1408cough:: I think watching it in a full cinema added to the experience too, though. Isn't it amusing when people get so involved they APPLAUD at various points in a movie? XDDD It was great!

So all in all it was a really good long weekend. :3

XD

And now for some music.

[01:19] Ally: http://5.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_krcvtl9RQq1qzfng8o1_500.jpg
[01:19] itsananimalthing: Pink, hat, coffee, ass shaking.
[01:19] itsananimalthing: So gay.
[01:19] Ally: it's like we were meant to be

---

Things I need consist of this:

✦ critter food
✦ cat litter
✦ gas money so I can get to school for the rest of the week

It really doesn't seem like a whole lot. But I'm still $125 in the hole and nothing is biting for interviews. I'm getting just a LITTLE pissy. I have food for TJ and I, we're not without that. But everything else? Yeah, that's a little fucked. I can scrounge /something/ up for the critters, but it's not going to last long.

Everyone else here (locally) seems to be just as broke as we are or simply too stingy with their money to toss a $20 or something my way.

I'm just so pissed. I'm missing my classes, not because I've got apathy or want to just hide from everything. I'm missing my fucking classes because I don't have the fucking gas to get out of my fucking driveway and I'm probably going to fail the two I still kept. All because of fucking dumb shit like this.

I just spend five minutes crying because I just don't know what to fucking do.